BISMARCK — The Center for Disease Control announced new guidelines in the United States today, banning social gatherings of more than ten people.
The new guidelines have left at least one homeschool family of eleven with the difficult decision to decide which member of their household will be the one to leave.
“This is a really difficult decision and we’re a little surprised,” says Daniel Bibleschmidt. “We’re now left with the very difficult decision of deciding who is going to be leaving us. Ultimately the decision is going to come down to a very intense game Settlers of Catan. We have the expansion pack so we can all play, but thanks to coronavirus, everyone is going to be hoarding and stockpiling their resources, so this game could last a few days.”
As the Bibleschmidt family wrestles with a real-world “Survivor” scenario, divisions are already leading to rivalries in their household.
“The wife and I are sleeping in separate beds at this point. It’s best for us to not build any additional emotional attachment,” says Daniel. “When I asked the Lord to place on my heart what I should give up for Lent this year, I didn’t expect it to be everything.”
The loser of the Bibleschmit Settlers of Catan tournament will be forced to live inside the family’s Chevrolet Express Cargo Van until the CDC lifts its ban on social gatherings.
Jothan Bibleschmidt, age 11, says he’s already strategizing ways to ensure he won’t be kicked out.
“My little sister is only three but mom and dad said she still has to play. I’ve been sharing my Goldfish Cracker rations with her today in hopes to form an alliance with her. If we do that and hoard our brick and wood, there’s no way we’re gonna lose. Even if we do, there’s plenty of Cheerios in the van.”
Still, the Bibleschmidt family says they’ve been prepared for Coronavirus for a long time.
“To be honest, we didn’t even know Coronavirus was a thing until last week. Everyone at Sams Club was shaming me for buying so much food, not realizing this is what I always buy. When your family has eleven people, it’s not unusual to go through 144 rolls of toilet paper in a few weeks. Thankfully, the pantry is stocked and the school closures won’t impact us. We’re a homeschool family and even the kids homeschool the kids. I guess you could say we’ve been preparing for this since our wedding day.”
More on this story as it develops.
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