Jamestown, N.D. — The North Dakota Highway Patrol recently announced the addition of 40 black patrol cars to their fleet.
According to the Highway Patrol, the black cars will be easier to spot in whiteout conditions, providing additional safety to motorists traveling across the state.
The Highway Patrol’s decision to add 40 black vehicles to its fleet has also shifted ethnic diversity in North Dakota. Prior to the announcement, according to the US Census Bureau, North Dakota was 90.0% white. That number has now dropped to 89.89995% thanks to the efforts of the Highway Patrol.
Jamarr Smith, a North Dakota resident, says he now feels more at ease since the announcement, claiming he can now better identify with law enforcement.
“I guess if I had a choice, I’d prefer to get pulled over by one of the black cars,” said Jamarr Smith of Fargo.
When asked how he felt about the black cars being easier to spot in whiteout conditions, Smith said that example is an “every day occurrence” for him.
“It’s always a whiteout condition in North Dakota, just look around. It don’t matter what time of year it is cause it’s always a whiteout. Sure those black cars will be easier to spot, but that means everyone will be blaming them when something goes wrong,” explained Smith.
One Fargo resident however, says the additional diversity in the Highway Patrol’s fleet makes him feel uneasy.
“Every time we add more diversity to our state, it seems like the crime goes up,” said the resident on condition of anonymity. “I’m betting it’s those trouble makers over at the Baptist Social Services who keep insisting we bring more refugees to the state. This is what happens when we try to be politically correct. As if we didn’t feel safe before, now we have to worry about gangs infiltrating our law enforcement too.”
Currently there’s no research supporting claims that black patrol cars are involved in higher rates of crime than white patrol cars.
More on this story as it develops.
*The Flickertail Times is a satirical (fake news) news blog focusing on all things North Dakotan. Feedback? We’d love to hear it! Send us anything and everything to: firstname.lastname@example.org.